5 Life Lessons I’ve Learned From My Pre-Teen

Author of 5 books, podcaster, parent trainer, husband and father.

Share This Post

Share on facebook
Share on twitter
Share on linkedin
Share on reddit
Share on email
It's 7:16 am and I'm standing by my garage door.

My car keys are in hand, the car is warming, the clock is moving, and I’m waiting. Just waiting! I made it clear an hour earlier that we had to leave by 7:15 am to make it to school on time. No exceptions!

But as it is, I have a front row seat to a colossal meltdown unfolding before my very eyes. As I wait, saying little to nothing, one of my pre-teen daughters frantically darts from our home office, to her bedroom, to the sunroom, and then back to the home office in a full-blown rant.

The reason? She can’t find the pair of shoes that she HAS to wear everyday! Oddly, it’s the same pair she’s been told countless times (no, hundreds of thousands) to place in the utility room where all shoes are kept. Apparently, I missed the part of that plan considered rocket science, but that’s just my error I suppose!

I’ve learned a lot from the brief time I’ve been a parent of not 1, but 2 pre-teen girls. Don’t get me wrong, there are a lot of great times and amazing moments with them. But other times, like the aforementioned moment, can be frustrating and hard. If you have pre-teens or teens, you know exactly what I’m talking about!

Here are 5 (not so serious) life lessons I’ve learned from my pre-teen daughters:

Lesson 1- “Nothing is ever my fault!”

It doesn’t matter that I was told exactly what to do and I did the opposite- it’s not my fault! Even though I nodded when you clearly explained the guidelines; even though we’ve been over the same thing 47 million times; even though I had plenty of time to get myself ready for school….it’s….not….my….fault that we’re late!

Lesson 2- “Everyone is out to get me!”

My 3-year old brother: out to get me! My teacher: out to get me! My parents: out to get me! The bus driver: out to get me! The clerk at Claires: yep, out to get me too! The mail lady: well, she didn’t bring me anything in the mail today, and the whole works revolves around me including the US Postal service. The only thing she delivered was the electric bill so we could have heat in our house, so she’s definitely out to get me!

Lesson 3- “The sky is, in fact, falling on my head!” 

Everything is a crisis and I need to live everyday in a state of panic. Seriously (waving my index finger) you don’t understand. The world as we know it will end if my favorite jeans are in the laundry (graciously washed by my amazing mother who does all of my laundry willingly) and I can’t wear them. What am I going to do? It’s over… I’m melting….I’m melting….what a world…. what a world….the inhumanity of it all!

Lesson 4- “Mom and dad have absolutely no idea what they’re talking about!”

Forget the fact that they’ve lived a combined 70 years of life and I’ve only amassed 11, they’re idiots. I can’t believe they have the audacity to tell me to wear deodorant and brush my teeth every day! Who do they think they are? Who makes them the expert?

Lesson 5- “Life is soooo not fair!”

Everyone else has an iPod touch. Everyone else gets to stay up as late as they want. Everyone else gets to watch whatever they want to watch, whenever they want to watch it. It’s not fair that you won’t let me! And on that note- it’s not fair that you allow my brothers and sisters to breath oxygen, eat food, see the light of day, and live out the constitution of the United States of America! Life is sooooo not fair!


Question- Do you have a pre-teen, or teen, living in your house? Can you identify with any of this? Join the conversation.

Share This Post

Share on facebook
Share on twitter
Share on linkedin
Share on reddit
Share on email
Mike and Kristin Berry are the Co-Founders of The Honestly Adoption Company and have been parents for nearly two decades. They are the authors of six books, and the host of The Honestly Adoption Podcast.

Sarah Gray

Sarah Gray is the executive assistant to Mike and Kristin Berry. And she is the best in the land. In addition to providing a warm and friendly response to the many emails our company receives on a weekly basis, she also manages Mike and Kristin’s speaking and meeting schedules, and makes sure that team events go off without a hitch.

Nicole Goerges

Nicole Goerges is a Content Contributor & Special Consultant for The Honestly Adoption Company. She works with Mike and Kristin as a recurring co-host for the Honestly Adoption Podcast, and co-host of Kitchen Table Talks, exclusive video content for Oasis Community, along with Kristin. She is a fellow adoptive mom, and former foster parent.

Matt McCarrick

Matt McCarrick is the Content Production Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. If you’ve loved listening to our podcast, or enjoyed any of the videos trainings we’ve published, you have Matt to thank. He oversees all of our content production, from video edits, to making sure the tags are correct on YouTube, to uploading new videos to Oasis, to hitting publish on a podcast episode, he’s a content wonder!

Karen Anderson

Karen Anderson is the Community Engagement Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. She spends the bulk of her time interacting with, and helping, people through our various social media channels, as well as providing support for Oasis Community members through chat support or Zoom calls. In the same spirit as Beaver, Karen is also passionate about connecting with parents and making them feel loved and supported. Karen is also an FASD trainer and travels often, equipping and encouraging parents.

Beaver Trumble

Beaver Trumble is the Customer Care Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. Chances are, if you have been in need of technical support, or forgotten your password to one of our courses, you have interacted with Beaver. He is an absolute pro at customer care. In fact, he single-handedly revolutionized our customer care department last year. Beaver is passionate about connecting with parents and making them feel loved and encouraged.

Kristin Berry

Kristin Berry is the co-founder of, and Chief Content Specialist for, The Honestly Adoption Company. She spends most of her time researching and connecting with guests for our podcast, as well as direction, designing and publishing a lot of the content for our social media channels, blog and podcast. She loves to connect with fellow parents around the world, and share the message of hope with them.

Mike Berry

Mike Berry is the co-founder of, and Chief Marketing Specialist for, The Honestly Adoption Company. He spends the bulk of his time and energy designing and building many of the resources you see within our company, as well as social media and email campaigns. His goal is to use media as a means to encourage and equip parents around the world. He is also the co-host of The Honestly Adoption Podcast.