I Decided To Take A Walk Instead.

Author of 5 books, podcaster, parent trainer, husband and father.

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I'm not that good at picking up on moments of opportunity. Even when they're standing right in front of me, I miss them. Yesterday, however, a small voice spoke to the deepest part of my heart and caused me to seize the moment.

I was in the middle of a very frustrating situation. There’s frustration and then there’s FRUSTRATION! I’m sure some of you understand what I’m talking about. To make a long story short, this blog, was crashing nearly every time someone navigated to a second or third page. People were sending me emails and texts saying they were getting error messages. I was nearing panic levels of epic proportions, and anyone who knows me well knows I never panic.

I had already been on an online chat for an hour with my server’s technical support trying to determine the issue. I took their advice, made some changes, reset a few things, but nothing was working. By 4 pm I was in my second chat and my frustration was growing. All I could think of were the thousands of readers who were being shut out. I couldn’t stand the thought.

“If I have to work all night to fix this, so be it. It’s worth it!” I decided.

As I sat at my desk in my home office, fuming, my kids were getting ready to take a walk with my wife. It was a sunny fall afternoon. Perfect for a stroll around the neighborhood.

“Dad, are you coming? We’re walking down to Miss Jen’s house,” my 11-year old said from the dining room.

“Not this time buddy. Daddy’s got work to do. My blog is crashing and I have to figure it out!”

He looked at me confused. He had no understanding of what I just said. After all, in his world, the biggest concerns are “Do I get to ride my bike?” “What’s for dinner?” and “Can I watch Transformers before bed?” It mattered not that hundreds of thousands of readers were possibly not able to log on. He could have cared less about database error messages or how slow pages were loading.

It consumed me. Often, it does. More than that, it often becomes an obsession. I want this blog to be good. Heck, I want it to be great, all the time! I’m driven by this. Sometimes, admittedly, I’m so driven that I forget about the people I’ve been blessed to live life with- my wife and kids. It happens more than I’d like to admit.

My children pulled their coats and shoes on, and began filing out our front door. I glanced up and watched them leave.

And That’s When It Hit Me!

The still small voice I mentioned earlier, spoke. “This can wait!” it whispered to my heart. “Get up and go with them. Take a walk instead of worrying about this right now!”

“But…the blog, my readers, the errors!” I argued silently.

“It will be okay,” the voice replied. “It will still be here when you return. You need to seize this moment with your wife and children.”

The voice was right. I spend too much time, and too much energy on other things, and often, my family pays the price. Granted, there’s work to be done. Confessions Of A Parent is read by hundreds of thousands of people each month. I love all of our readers and subscribers. And I love to interact with people from all over the globe. But my family must take top priority.

Sometimes, I confess, I’m really bad at making sure of that!

It ‘Happens’, But It Needs To Change!

It happens often to all of us. You, me, our spouses, our friends and our neighbors wrestle with it. We are so busy with so many things, that our family drops from first place to second, third, or even a distant fourth. It happens…but it needs to change!

Before I point a finger, I’ve got to deal with the four pointing back at me. That’s why I decided to write this. I believe a balance must be achieved and I’m saying this to myself before anyone else. In terms of my situation yesterday, the work was not disappearing, the frustration wasn’t going away. It would be there when I returned.

So, I Took A Walk Instead!

I listened. I followed what I heard in my heart. I put my work on pause and got up. Gosh, it felt good to do that. It wasn’t easy at all, but I did it. In the back of my mind the panic persisted. But, that’s always there. For anyone who is driven to succeed like I am, you know; the panic is always there!

What will someday not be there are moments with my children. Someday, they will be all grown up, scattered across the country, leading and loving their own families, working hard at their jobs, building their own dreams, and I will be an old man, living out the glorious days I’ve been blessed with. That’s just reality.

What I hope is not reality are the moments with them when they were younger, that I traded for something I thought was more important. Something that was fleeting. My heart aches as I think about that. I shutter to think of how often I’m so driven to succeed that I miss the moments that are right in front of my face, beckoning me to seize them.

There is no substitute for hard work. When it comes to this blog, and the books I’m working on, hard work is the bottom line. I have to give it everything I’ve got. You do too. There are people depending on us. You have co-workers who are waiting for you to finish a project. I have readers (you) who anticipate great content. That’s very important to me. My heart beats for speaking hope into overwhelmed people’s lives. That won’t change.

What needs to change is my list of priorities, and the frequency I seize moments, like the one I was given yesterday. The hardest part for me is staying tuned in to them.

I took the walk with my wife and kids. I hit pause on fixing the errors on my blog and walked out of my office, and down the sidewalk with these precious people God has blessed me with. Guess what? When I returned home I was able to resolve the issues. (Big shout out to Bluehost for their awesome customer support!). In my heart, I’m thankful for the voice. I’m thankful for the prodding. I needed to seize this moment. Who knows, I may have missed more than I could’ve imagined if I didn’t!

Do you struggle with priorities? Who or what is most important in your life? Join the conversation.

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Mike and Kristin Berry are the Co-Founders of The Honestly Adoption Company and have been parents for nearly two decades. They are the authors of six books, and the host of The Honestly Adoption Podcast.

Sarah Gray

Sarah Gray is the executive assistant to Mike and Kristin Berry. And she is the best in the land. In addition to providing a warm and friendly response to the many emails our company receives on a weekly basis, she also manages Mike and Kristin’s speaking and meeting schedules, and makes sure that team events go off without a hitch.

Nicole Goerges

Nicole Goerges is a Content Contributor & Special Consultant for The Honestly Adoption Company. She works with Mike and Kristin as a recurring co-host for the Honestly Adoption Podcast, and co-host of Kitchen Table Talks, exclusive video content for Oasis Community, along with Kristin. She is a fellow adoptive mom, and former foster parent.

Matt McCarrick

Matt McCarrick is the Content Production Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. If you’ve loved listening to our podcast, or enjoyed any of the videos trainings we’ve published, you have Matt to thank. He oversees all of our content production, from video edits, to making sure the tags are correct on YouTube, to uploading new videos to Oasis, to hitting publish on a podcast episode, he’s a content wonder!

Karen Anderson

Karen Anderson is the Community Engagement Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. She spends the bulk of her time interacting with, and helping, people through our various social media channels, as well as providing support for Oasis Community members through chat support or Zoom calls. In the same spirit as Beaver, Karen is also passionate about connecting with parents and making them feel loved and supported. Karen is also an FASD trainer and travels often, equipping and encouraging parents.

Beaver Trumble

Beaver Trumble is the Customer Care Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. Chances are, if you have been in need of technical support, or forgotten your password to one of our courses, you have interacted with Beaver. He is an absolute pro at customer care. In fact, he single-handedly revolutionized our customer care department last year. Beaver is passionate about connecting with parents and making them feel loved and encouraged.

Kristin Berry

Kristin Berry is the co-founder of, and Chief Content Specialist for, The Honestly Adoption Company. She spends most of her time researching and connecting with guests for our podcast, as well as direction, designing and publishing a lot of the content for our social media channels, blog and podcast. She loves to connect with fellow parents around the world, and share the message of hope with them.

Mike Berry

Mike Berry is the co-founder of, and Chief Marketing Specialist for, The Honestly Adoption Company. He spends the bulk of his time and energy designing and building many of the resources you see within our company, as well as social media and email campaigns. His goal is to use media as a means to encourage and equip parents around the world. He is also the co-host of The Honestly Adoption Podcast.