In-Spite Of Hard Moments, This Is So Beautiful!

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Often over the last several years, we've been asked if adoption and foster care is really worth it. Granted, this question usually comes from people outside of the journey, who are peering into our lives wondering. Our answer is a solid. YES! Here's why...

It was one of those long days, yesterday, where you’re doing a million things but not really getting anything done. Ever had a day like that? No margin, no time to take a breath, just running, and running, and running. By the time I finally made it home last night with my teenagers, around 6pm, I was completely exhausted. So exhausted, in fact, that I had been thinking about my bed, and the the 3-inch memory foam on it, since I had crawled out of it at 5am early that morning!

But my exhaustion melted when I walked through the door. “Hi daddy,” I heard my son say from the other side of the kitchen. Then I was blind-sided by my youngest son, who came running full-speed from the other room, to jump into my arms. A little while later, Kristin and I sat on the sofa with our 16-year old daughter, talking about the day, and giggling about the crazy, weird, and “shocking” stuff that happened at her school. That’s when the thought hit me, “My goodness…this life is just…beautiful!”

It was one of those rare moments when a surge of energy filled my body and I was suddenly wide awake…at 10pm….way past my bedtime! I watched my beautiful girl kiss her mother on the head as she trotted upstairs for bed.

Now I know what you’re thinking…. “too good to be true.” Or, “Gosh, wish I felt like that ever about my journey!” Perhaps you’re about to zone out and go back to mindlessly scrolling through Facebook or Instagram because you feel like you can’t relate. Hang in there with me for a minute. Here’s why…

I’m telling you that our life is beautiful, yes. Because it is! But it’s also been really, reeeeeeally hard over the past few years. Our children struggle with things from their past that are out of their control and we struggle to parent them in exactly the way they need us to.

We’ve had to wrestle away the guilty feelings that our children’s struggles were our fault, or that we were failures as parents.

We’ve cried enough tears over our children to fill an ocean.

We’ve taken our children’s struggle to trust us personally.

We’ve almost given up on the idea of ever finding any hope.

And all of this has been within the past 5 years. Heck, even the past few weeks, if I’m honest!

Yet, I tell you, with all of my heart….in-spite of all of this, this life is beautiful. So, incredibly, vibrantly beautiful!


Because true love is always worth it!

So why are we honest about the hardships of adoption and foster care? Because the hard things are the things worth doing. Parenting is always hard, but when we recognize the difficulty we can plan and prepare to face the hard things with confidence.

So yes, it’s been a hard road at times. Yes, it’s been exhausting. Yes, we’ve struggled. But no, we wouldn’t trade any of it. The beautiful and hard moments combined have made us better people and parents. And yes, this journey is worth it. And it’s filled with beauty.

Last night, as I tucked my sons into bed, and was closing their drapes, I peered out of their window to see a gorgeous sunset. We haven’t seen the sun for days. It’s been raining here for the past week. But I realized that even with the clouds and rain, the sun has been there the entire time. The beauty of it was momentarily covered by clouds and storms. But it never left. And consider this truth: No storm lasts forever.

Where have you discovered beauty on the adoption or foster journey?

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Mike and Kristin Berry are the Co-Founders of The Honestly Adoption Company and have been parents for nearly two decades. They are the authors of six books, and the host of The Honestly Adoption Podcast.

Sarah Gray

Sarah Gray is the executive assistant to Mike and Kristin Berry. And she is the best in the land. In addition to providing a warm and friendly response to the many emails our company receives on a weekly basis, she also manages Mike and Kristin’s speaking and meeting schedules, and makes sure that team events go off without a hitch.

Nicole Goerges

Nicole Goerges is a Content Contributor & Special Consultant for The Honestly Adoption Company. She works with Mike and Kristin as a recurring co-host for the Honestly Adoption Podcast, and co-host of Kitchen Table Talks, exclusive video content for Oasis Community, along with Kristin. She is a fellow adoptive mom, and former foster parent.

Matt McCarrick

Matt McCarrick is the Content Production Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. If you’ve loved listening to our podcast, or enjoyed any of the videos trainings we’ve published, you have Matt to thank. He oversees all of our content production, from video edits, to making sure the tags are correct on YouTube, to uploading new videos to Oasis, to hitting publish on a podcast episode, he’s a content wonder!

Karen Anderson

Karen Anderson is the Community Engagement Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. She spends the bulk of her time interacting with, and helping, people through our various social media channels, as well as providing support for Oasis Community members through chat support or Zoom calls. In the same spirit as Beaver, Karen is also passionate about connecting with parents and making them feel loved and supported. Karen is also an FASD trainer and travels often, equipping and encouraging parents.

Beaver Trumble

Beaver Trumble is the Customer Care Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. Chances are, if you have been in need of technical support, or forgotten your password to one of our courses, you have interacted with Beaver. He is an absolute pro at customer care. In fact, he single-handedly revolutionized our customer care department last year. Beaver is passionate about connecting with parents and making them feel loved and encouraged.

Kristin Berry

Kristin Berry is the co-founder of, and Chief Content Specialist for, The Honestly Adoption Company. She spends most of her time researching and connecting with guests for our podcast, as well as direction, designing and publishing a lot of the content for our social media channels, blog and podcast. She loves to connect with fellow parents around the world, and share the message of hope with them.

Mike Berry

Mike Berry is the co-founder of, and Chief Marketing Specialist for, The Honestly Adoption Company. He spends the bulk of his time and energy designing and building many of the resources you see within our company, as well as social media and email campaigns. His goal is to use media as a means to encourage and equip parents around the world. He is also the co-host of The Honestly Adoption Podcast.