Okay With Not Being Okay

Author of 5 books, podcaster, parent trainer, husband and father.

Share This Post

Share on facebook
Share on twitter
Share on linkedin
Share on reddit
Share on email
We used to strive for perfection.

There was a day, not that long ago, when we worked extremely hard at being the perfect couple, the perfect homeowners, the perfect friends, and of course, the perfect parents. When it came to our children and how they were dressed, how they behaved, and how we looked as parents, we nearly obsessed over having it all “together!” Especially in public places.

But when the perfection road dead-ended (and it always did), we became frustrated. Sometimes very frustrated.

We couldn’t understand how putting all of this time and energy into our life didn’t equal out to perfect results. Why did we still have disagreements and fights in our marriage? Why did our home always seem to be trashed? Why was our schedule still chaotic and rushed? And why, for goodness sake, did our children still misbehave, make bad choices, and embarrass us in public?

Why?

The answer was quite simple……we’re human beings and we’re not perfect. Nor will we ever be.

Try as we may, we will never have the perfect marriage, the perfect home, the perfect schedule, or the perfect children who rise in the morning with a smile and pleasant attitude and embrace us with thanksgiving in their hearts for all we’ve done for them. After all, they’re not perfect either :-).

We’re all broken. We’re all a mess. Not one of the 7 billion of us on this spinning planet is completely okay (by perfection’s standard).

When we stopped and really looked at our lives, and realized we were chasing a rainbow by striving for perfection, we found peace. We realized the key to true peace was found in being okay with not being okay.

Let me say that again- we found peace by being okay with not being okay.

…okay with not having perfect children!
…okay with not having a perfect house!
…okay with not having the perfect marriage!
…okay not looking like, acting like, or being the perfect human beings…or the perfect parents!

If you want to find true peace as a parent, a husband, a wife, or a human being…you have to be okay with not being okay. You have to be okay with the brokenness that comes with being a human being. It will change the way you see your life!

Question- Are you okay with not being okay? What has prevented you from finding this peace in your life, or your parenting?

 

Share This Post

Share on facebook
Share on twitter
Share on linkedin
Share on reddit
Share on email
Mike and Kristin Berry are the Co-Founders of The Honestly Adoption Company and have been parents for nearly two decades. They are the authors of six books, and the host of The Honestly Adoption Podcast.

Sarah Gray

Sarah Gray is the executive assistant to Mike and Kristin Berry. And she is the best in the land. In addition to providing a warm and friendly response to the many emails our company receives on a weekly basis, she also manages Mike and Kristin’s speaking and meeting schedules, and makes sure that team events go off without a hitch.

Nicole Goerges

Nicole Goerges is a Content Contributor & Special Consultant for The Honestly Adoption Company. She works with Mike and Kristin as a recurring co-host for the Honestly Adoption Podcast, and co-host of Kitchen Table Talks, exclusive video content for Oasis Community, along with Kristin. She is a fellow adoptive mom, and former foster parent.

Matt McCarrick

Matt McCarrick is the Content Production Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. If you’ve loved listening to our podcast, or enjoyed any of the videos trainings we’ve published, you have Matt to thank. He oversees all of our content production, from video edits, to making sure the tags are correct on YouTube, to uploading new videos to Oasis, to hitting publish on a podcast episode, he’s a content wonder!

Karen Anderson

Karen Anderson is the Community Engagement Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. She spends the bulk of her time interacting with, and helping, people through our various social media channels, as well as providing support for Oasis Community members through chat support or Zoom calls. In the same spirit as Beaver, Karen is also passionate about connecting with parents and making them feel loved and supported. Karen is also an FASD trainer and travels often, equipping and encouraging parents.

Beaver Trumble

Beaver Trumble is the Customer Care Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. Chances are, if you have been in need of technical support, or forgotten your password to one of our courses, you have interacted with Beaver. He is an absolute pro at customer care. In fact, he single-handedly revolutionized our customer care department last year. Beaver is passionate about connecting with parents and making them feel loved and encouraged.

Kristin Berry

Kristin Berry is the co-founder of, and Chief Content Specialist for, The Honestly Adoption Company. She spends most of her time researching and connecting with guests for our podcast, as well as direction, designing and publishing a lot of the content for our social media channels, blog and podcast. She loves to connect with fellow parents around the world, and share the message of hope with them.

Mike Berry

Mike Berry is the co-founder of, and Chief Marketing Specialist for, The Honestly Adoption Company. He spends the bulk of his time and energy designing and building many of the resources you see within our company, as well as social media and email campaigns. His goal is to use media as a means to encourage and equip parents around the world. He is also the co-host of The Honestly Adoption Podcast.