Permission To Be Late.

Author of 5 books, podcaster, parent trainer, husband and father.

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My wife is really good at challenging me. Sometimes, it takes awhile to digest, but it’s always good for me, and it always helps me grow. Lately, she has shared some things with me that are helping me more than I realize...and I need it!

She read an article a few weeks ago that talked about the permission smartphones (particularly iPhones) give to society.

Permission to be late.

Hey, sorry, stuck in traffic… be a little late!

Really hate to do this, but I think we need to reschedule our 1pm. Not gonna make it. Lunch appointment ran over.

I’m almost there, hitting every light tho..

Be about 5 minutes late. So sorry! 

Well here I am again, running late! Really sorry bro!

I bet you’ve sent a few of those yourself, haven’t you? I have. In fact, all of the above are actual texts that I’ve sent over the past 2 weeks. I cringe as I read them.

I cringe because, 10 years ago I wouldn’t have sent text messages like these. I couldn’t. Texting didn’t exist, at least not publicly like it does now. I either had to face the awkwardness of showing up to a meeting late or be on time. Those were my choices. But not today. I can be late.

Because of our wicked technology, we have given ourselves permission to be late…to everything!

And we’re okay with this. You’re okay with this. I’m okay with this. Our whole worId is okay with this.

For some reason I find myself having this sick belief that since I sent the text message a few minutes before the start of the meeting, explaining away my lateness, that everything is okay and the person I was supposed to meet with, who most likely planned a portion of their afternoon around this specific time, is going to be okay and understand.

Wrong! So wrong! This is on me.

Here’s where my heart is really struck- I keep doing this to my daughter. A lot, actually. Ouch!! Even as I type those words it stings!

The amount of times I have left her standing outside of her school waiting….wondering…and watching every other classmate get picked up by their parent on time, is too high to count anymore.

Truthfully, it makes me sick. I have given myself permission to be late. Because of a luxurious device I have given me the go ahead to suck at scheduling and monitor my time responsibly, in a way that gets me to my next appointment on time (even early). More over, I have given myself permission to disappoint my daughter.

She expects me to be late.

And not just her! My wife… my other children… the people who seek me out for help.

That’s not good enough! I’m supposed to show up when I say I’m going to. More importantly than that, I’m a husband and a father. That’s the most important role I play. It’s my duty to show up when I say I’m going to show up.

In my heart of hearts, I hate being late. I hate it so bad that I could scream. So why do I haphazardly text someone else when I’m running late to meet with them? It’s just not good enough anymore!

It’s time I stop giving myself permission to be late and start giving myself permission to do what I say I’m going to do when I say I’m going to do it! With the people I meet with on a daily basis but most importantly, with the little girl who calls me daddy.

Maybe it’s time for you to do the same thing?

Are you giving yourself permission to be late? Share your story and maybe what change you need to make personally?

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Mike and Kristin Berry are the Co-Founders of The Honestly Adoption Company and have been parents for nearly two decades. They are the authors of six books, and the host of The Honestly Adoption Podcast.

Sarah Gray

Sarah Gray is the executive assistant to Mike and Kristin Berry. And she is the best in the land. In addition to providing a warm and friendly response to the many emails our company receives on a weekly basis, she also manages Mike and Kristin’s speaking and meeting schedules, and makes sure that team events go off without a hitch.

Nicole Goerges

Nicole Goerges is a Content Contributor & Special Consultant for The Honestly Adoption Company. She works with Mike and Kristin as a recurring co-host for the Honestly Adoption Podcast, and co-host of Kitchen Table Talks, exclusive video content for Oasis Community, along with Kristin. She is a fellow adoptive mom, and former foster parent.

Matt McCarrick

Matt McCarrick is the Content Production Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. If you’ve loved listening to our podcast, or enjoyed any of the videos trainings we’ve published, you have Matt to thank. He oversees all of our content production, from video edits, to making sure the tags are correct on YouTube, to uploading new videos to Oasis, to hitting publish on a podcast episode, he’s a content wonder!

Karen Anderson

Karen Anderson is the Community Engagement Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. She spends the bulk of her time interacting with, and helping, people through our various social media channels, as well as providing support for Oasis Community members through chat support or Zoom calls. In the same spirit as Beaver, Karen is also passionate about connecting with parents and making them feel loved and supported. Karen is also an FASD trainer and travels often, equipping and encouraging parents.

Beaver Trumble

Beaver Trumble is the Customer Care Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. Chances are, if you have been in need of technical support, or forgotten your password to one of our courses, you have interacted with Beaver. He is an absolute pro at customer care. In fact, he single-handedly revolutionized our customer care department last year. Beaver is passionate about connecting with parents and making them feel loved and encouraged.

Kristin Berry

Kristin Berry is the co-founder of, and Chief Content Specialist for, The Honestly Adoption Company. She spends most of her time researching and connecting with guests for our podcast, as well as direction, designing and publishing a lot of the content for our social media channels, blog and podcast. She loves to connect with fellow parents around the world, and share the message of hope with them.

Mike Berry

Mike Berry is the co-founder of, and Chief Marketing Specialist for, The Honestly Adoption Company. He spends the bulk of his time and energy designing and building many of the resources you see within our company, as well as social media and email campaigns. His goal is to use media as a means to encourage and equip parents around the world. He is also the co-host of The Honestly Adoption Podcast.