Seize Every Opportunity!

Author of 5 books, podcaster, parent trainer, husband and father.

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One of the biggest lessons I'm learning, as my children grow older, is to seize every opportunity I'm given to speak love and truth into their young lives. It's not easy, and I fail often. But, man oh man is it worth it.

It happened yesterday morning. I almost let it pass. The easy choice would have been to say nothing, keep on driving, and let the day progress as normal. But I’m sure glad something prompted me not to do that. Call it what you may, but I believe it was God Himself speaking.

The night before we had caught our daughter texting a boy she has been told to not text, ever. We have our reasons, and I can assure you, they are all valid.

But she went against what we had told her. As she stood in our kitchen listening, we explained that, one- she was too young to be texting boys and, two- boys are supposed to pursue girls, not the other way around. Even though we do not want her to be “pursued” at age 13, we explained to her why, someday, this would be the appropriate way to meet a boy (but face to face, not over text!).

The drive was unusually quiet yesterday morning. She was somber. Her phone had been taken so texting her friends and giggling over their response the entire trip to school was not an option. Suddenly, as I eased to a stop at an intersection, a still small voice spoke to me- “Speak up! Say something about last night.”

“But I don’t want to!” I countered.

“Doesn’t matter if you don’t want to, you need to!” it persisted.

“No, not now, it’s morning, she’s tired, she’s bummed…she’ll only roll her eyes and tune me out!”

Do it!” (yes, the voices in my head are that demanding! :-))

It wouldn’t stop bouncing back and forth in my mind, so, finally, I relented. Turning to my little girl, I said gently, “Honey, do you know why mom and I were upset last night, and why we’ve said no to texting this boy?”

She slowly nodded.

“We want the best for you,” I continued. “We think you are a gorgeous, talented, precious girl who deserves the ultimate respect. You deserved to be pursued someday. And if a boy is not willing to do that, then he’s not worth it.” She half smiled and nodded again as we continued on to school.

Whew! A weight was lifted.

Fathers (especially), but also mothers, I cannot begin to tell you how relieved and overwhelmed I was in that moment. I can also not begin to tell you how often I’ve allowed these moments to pass right by me. Moments to speak truth, love, direction and influence into my child’s life. There are times I wish I could go back in time and reverse them.

This post is a plea. It’s a plea that comes from the heart of a father who has screwed up but is trying to do things right. It’s a plea from a person with a packed schedule who is constantly on the go and moving at the speed of light. It’s a plea to slow down and seize the opportunities we’re given to influence our children. I’m writing this mostly as a reminder and challenge to myself.

But I also write to you, fathers…mothers, and anyone else who is blessed to be involved in a child’s life. Seize every single moment that comes your way. It will influence their life in ways you cannot begin to imagine. And, it will change yours!

Have you let moments with your children pass by lately? What do you need to do differently?

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Mike and Kristin Berry are the Co-Founders of The Honestly Adoption Company and have been parents for nearly two decades. They are the authors of six books, and the host of The Honestly Adoption Podcast.

Sarah Gray

Sarah Gray is the executive assistant to Mike and Kristin Berry. And she is the best in the land. In addition to providing a warm and friendly response to the many emails our company receives on a weekly basis, she also manages Mike and Kristin’s speaking and meeting schedules, and makes sure that team events go off without a hitch.

Nicole Goerges

Nicole Goerges is a Content Contributor & Special Consultant for The Honestly Adoption Company. She works with Mike and Kristin as a recurring co-host for the Honestly Adoption Podcast, and co-host of Kitchen Table Talks, exclusive video content for Oasis Community, along with Kristin. She is a fellow adoptive mom, and former foster parent.

Matt McCarrick

Matt McCarrick is the Content Production Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. If you’ve loved listening to our podcast, or enjoyed any of the videos trainings we’ve published, you have Matt to thank. He oversees all of our content production, from video edits, to making sure the tags are correct on YouTube, to uploading new videos to Oasis, to hitting publish on a podcast episode, he’s a content wonder!

Karen Anderson

Karen Anderson is the Community Engagement Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. She spends the bulk of her time interacting with, and helping, people through our various social media channels, as well as providing support for Oasis Community members through chat support or Zoom calls. In the same spirit as Beaver, Karen is also passionate about connecting with parents and making them feel loved and supported. Karen is also an FASD trainer and travels often, equipping and encouraging parents.

Beaver Trumble

Beaver Trumble is the Customer Care Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. Chances are, if you have been in need of technical support, or forgotten your password to one of our courses, you have interacted with Beaver. He is an absolute pro at customer care. In fact, he single-handedly revolutionized our customer care department last year. Beaver is passionate about connecting with parents and making them feel loved and encouraged.

Kristin Berry

Kristin Berry is the co-founder of, and Chief Content Specialist for, The Honestly Adoption Company. She spends most of her time researching and connecting with guests for our podcast, as well as direction, designing and publishing a lot of the content for our social media channels, blog and podcast. She loves to connect with fellow parents around the world, and share the message of hope with them.

Mike Berry

Mike Berry is the co-founder of, and Chief Marketing Specialist for, The Honestly Adoption Company. He spends the bulk of his time and energy designing and building many of the resources you see within our company, as well as social media and email campaigns. His goal is to use media as a means to encourage and equip parents around the world. He is also the co-host of The Honestly Adoption Podcast.