The Amazing Grace Of Our Children.

Author of 5 books, podcaster, parent trainer, husband and father.

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I'm going to get a little vulnerable for a moment and write purely from a parent's heart.

My children are the embodiment of grace. I’m constantly amazed at how forgiving and compassionate they are. I’m sure many of you are nodding your head right now because you’ve experienced the same thing with your children.

I’m overwhelmed as I ponder this, because there are so many times where I’ve snapped at them or spoken harshly toward them, but they still forgive me. They still run to me and jump in my arms. They still want to wrestle and have tickle fights. They still tell me they love me at night when I tuck them in. Wow! Amazing grace at it’s finest.

Last week I was mowing our front yard on a warm afternoon when I suddenly felt something hit me from behind. It was my 10 year old son. He had just gotten off of the school bus and the first thing he did was run to give me a hug. His small arms wrapped around my waist and he squeezed while resting his head in the center of my back.

You have to understand, my relationship with him has been quite difficult over the past decade.

Because of his behavioral choices I have found myself frustrated and angry with him a lot. In fact, I’ve been known to jump to conclusions, on more than one occasion, before actually hearing his side of the story. I admit- I’m way more reactive than proactive with him.

I hate that, however. I’m bothered by my constant frustration with him. I don’t want to be that kind of parent. I feel guilty when I snap at him and abruptly send him to time out without a chance to speak or defend himself. I can’t even begin to count how many times I’ve hung my head and thought to myself, “I’m the worst father in the world. How could he ever love me or want me in his life?”

But he does. He’s forgiven me time and time again. On an afternoon when I was mulling some of this over (in the wake of a tumultuous morning), the first thing he did after getting off of the bus was run to me and give me a huge hug. That’s grace! In spite of my overreaction, and refusal to hear him out, he wiped my slate clean. That’s the amazing thing about kids. They are such good grace givers!

But this is where I need to take warning. I cannot become comfortable with the fact that my children are good grace-givers to the point that my behavior as a parent does not improve. To do so would be abuse of their grace. The most important thing I can do is receive their grace, learn from it, and make better choices, as a parent, going forward.

In other words, I need to allow their grace to heal my mistakes, like making snap judgements, not listening to them, or speaking harshly toward them, and then change my behavior moving forward. There’s 2 choices: become comfortable, continue as I am, or change! It’s about personal growth.

Obviously, I have a long way to go and a lot of that growth to undergo. But, don’t we all? I’m sure you can identify with some (or all) of this. I’m sure you’ve found yourself rowing in the same boat as me. I pray for more afternoons where my son rams into me with a huge hug after getting off the bus! But my prayer is that I change in such a way that his hugs are not in the wake of me hurting him or overreacting to something he did or said, but rather just a part of the day.

I take either, though. Truth is, I’m human!

Do your children display amazing grace? Have you experienced this recently? What has it taught you?

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Mike and Kristin Berry are the Co-Founders of The Honestly Adoption Company and have been parents for nearly two decades. They are the authors of six books, and the host of The Honestly Adoption Podcast.

Sarah Gray

Sarah Gray is the executive assistant to Mike and Kristin Berry. And she is the best in the land. In addition to providing a warm and friendly response to the many emails our company receives on a weekly basis, she also manages Mike and Kristin’s speaking and meeting schedules, and makes sure that team events go off without a hitch.

Nicole Goerges

Nicole Goerges is a Content Contributor & Special Consultant for The Honestly Adoption Company. She works with Mike and Kristin as a recurring co-host for the Honestly Adoption Podcast, and co-host of Kitchen Table Talks, exclusive video content for Oasis Community, along with Kristin. She is a fellow adoptive mom, and former foster parent.

Matt McCarrick

Matt McCarrick is the Content Production Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. If you’ve loved listening to our podcast, or enjoyed any of the videos trainings we’ve published, you have Matt to thank. He oversees all of our content production, from video edits, to making sure the tags are correct on YouTube, to uploading new videos to Oasis, to hitting publish on a podcast episode, he’s a content wonder!

Karen Anderson

Karen Anderson is the Community Engagement Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. She spends the bulk of her time interacting with, and helping, people through our various social media channels, as well as providing support for Oasis Community members through chat support or Zoom calls. In the same spirit as Beaver, Karen is also passionate about connecting with parents and making them feel loved and supported. Karen is also an FASD trainer and travels often, equipping and encouraging parents.

Beaver Trumble

Beaver Trumble is the Customer Care Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. Chances are, if you have been in need of technical support, or forgotten your password to one of our courses, you have interacted with Beaver. He is an absolute pro at customer care. In fact, he single-handedly revolutionized our customer care department last year. Beaver is passionate about connecting with parents and making them feel loved and encouraged.

Kristin Berry

Kristin Berry is the co-founder of, and Chief Content Specialist for, The Honestly Adoption Company. She spends most of her time researching and connecting with guests for our podcast, as well as direction, designing and publishing a lot of the content for our social media channels, blog and podcast. She loves to connect with fellow parents around the world, and share the message of hope with them.

Mike Berry

Mike Berry is the co-founder of, and Chief Marketing Specialist for, The Honestly Adoption Company. He spends the bulk of his time and energy designing and building many of the resources you see within our company, as well as social media and email campaigns. His goal is to use media as a means to encourage and equip parents around the world. He is also the co-host of The Honestly Adoption Podcast.