The Wounds Are Healing

Author of 5 books, podcaster, parent trainer, husband and father.

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Where do you go to find healing for your wounded spirit? That's a big question. A few years ago, I discovered something that I hadn't really given much thought to before. It came from the most unlikely place with the most unlikely people- a support group with complete strangers. Sounds intimidating, right? But what I discovered from my experience with them was that I was not alone on this difficult journey called parenthood. That night I learned that other people have the same wounds as I do. Realizing this brought healing to my life!

You and I can read a thousand self-help books, attend conferences and seminars on becoming a better parent, and we can even watch Dr. Phil or Oprah until our brains are soaked with information. There is nothing wrong with any of this. Honestly speaking, we can find some help and coping through each.

But I’ve personally discovered there is nothing more powerful, nor healing, than discovering that you’re not alone. Other parents struggle just like you. Another mom has struggled with a lack of affection for her son. Another dad loses his temper and yells at his daughter. Been there, done that, and I’m still alive!

That’s why Alcoholics Anonymous, or any other support and recovery group, are such powerful tool for helping people through their addictions. You walk in an addict with no chance, and you walk out discovering hope and that you are not alone in your battle.

Same with parenting. When you discover there are others in this un-ending battle with you, you find hope…

…A mom sitting next to you rolls up her sleeves and reveals the bruises up and down her arms that her son left in a fit of rage. Through tears she explains that she can’t take it anymore. You’ve been there…

…A dad in your neighborhood is at a loss because he discovered that his son is looking at pornograhic images on his iPod touch. He wrestles with wanting to smash the iPod with a hammer or firmly and constructively walk with his son to a healthy place. You’ve had those feelings…

…A mom has battled and battled and battled with her son’s school over his special needs, and requesting extra help for him, to no avail. It seems as though they’ve turned a deaf ear. You’ve been that frustrated…

…After 3 miscarriages, the couple that used to be full of life when they talked about raising a family, looks beaten down and defeated. Slowly, they’re becoming jaded with not only having children, but with each other and the life they share. You’ve felt that desperate and hopeless…

When you see other parents limp through life the same way you are limping, you gain the hope you need to go from a crawl, to a limp, to walking again. We have personally discovered this in our lives. We have lived through the humiliation of our child’s violent outbursts in public, the trauma it caused our other children, and the fallout with other people.

We have stood by helplessly, while our child rejected us and chased after superficial relationships. We have felt the deep sting of a child who, because of the difficult background he came from, could not emotionally connect with us on any level for years.

These moments hurt deeply. They still do in a lot of ways. What saved us, and gave us hope, was the discovery that other parents have dealt with, and were currently dealing with, the same struggle. We are not alone!

The goal for this blog is to let parents world wide know that very truth- “You are not alone! The wounds are healing! We limp the same!” It was never designed to be a “how-to” when it comes to parenting. The world is full of that and it’s not wrong at all. There are great books and conferences on parenting techniques and philosophy. But, in the difficult journey of parenting we need to hear some real life. We need to experience community. This blog exists to be an “I know, I’ve been there!” when it comes to parenting.

The wounds are healing, and you are not alone. If nothing else, may you hear that and may it ring in your ears throughout this day.

Have you struggled to grasp this lately? What are you struggling with? We would love to hear from you.

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Mike and Kristin Berry are the Co-Founders of The Honestly Adoption Company and have been parents for nearly two decades. They are the authors of six books, and the host of The Honestly Adoption Podcast.

Sarah Gray

Sarah Gray is the executive assistant to Mike and Kristin Berry. And she is the best in the land. In addition to providing a warm and friendly response to the many emails our company receives on a weekly basis, she also manages Mike and Kristin’s speaking and meeting schedules, and makes sure that team events go off without a hitch.

Nicole Goerges

Nicole Goerges is a Content Contributor & Special Consultant for The Honestly Adoption Company. She works with Mike and Kristin as a recurring co-host for the Honestly Adoption Podcast, and co-host of Kitchen Table Talks, exclusive video content for Oasis Community, along with Kristin. She is a fellow adoptive mom, and former foster parent.

Matt McCarrick

Matt McCarrick is the Content Production Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. If you’ve loved listening to our podcast, or enjoyed any of the videos trainings we’ve published, you have Matt to thank. He oversees all of our content production, from video edits, to making sure the tags are correct on YouTube, to uploading new videos to Oasis, to hitting publish on a podcast episode, he’s a content wonder!

Karen Anderson

Karen Anderson is the Community Engagement Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. She spends the bulk of her time interacting with, and helping, people through our various social media channels, as well as providing support for Oasis Community members through chat support or Zoom calls. In the same spirit as Beaver, Karen is also passionate about connecting with parents and making them feel loved and supported. Karen is also an FASD trainer and travels often, equipping and encouraging parents.

Beaver Trumble

Beaver Trumble is the Customer Care Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. Chances are, if you have been in need of technical support, or forgotten your password to one of our courses, you have interacted with Beaver. He is an absolute pro at customer care. In fact, he single-handedly revolutionized our customer care department last year. Beaver is passionate about connecting with parents and making them feel loved and encouraged.

Kristin Berry

Kristin Berry is the co-founder of, and Chief Content Specialist for, The Honestly Adoption Company. She spends most of her time researching and connecting with guests for our podcast, as well as direction, designing and publishing a lot of the content for our social media channels, blog and podcast. She loves to connect with fellow parents around the world, and share the message of hope with them.

Mike Berry

Mike Berry is the co-founder of, and Chief Marketing Specialist for, The Honestly Adoption Company. He spends the bulk of his time and energy designing and building many of the resources you see within our company, as well as social media and email campaigns. His goal is to use media as a means to encourage and equip parents around the world. He is also the co-host of The Honestly Adoption Podcast.