We Are More Than Our Adoption.

Author of 4 books, podcaster, parent trainer, wife and mother.

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Our society prides itself on titles, positions, rankings, and statistics. It's how we identify pro-atheletes, leaders of major corporations, and our favorite sports teams. Often, it's how we identify ourselves. But we have learned that, in our family, we are much more than a title.

Ok, Ok I understand our blog is called Confessions of an Adoptive Parent. It’s easy to think that we eat sleep and breathe adoption. Our title is a brand but it isn’t all that we are. Adoption, to us, is more like a surname. A last name is an identifier but it isn’t a person’s sole identity.

Last summer I was volunteering with lovely woman at an event at a local park. We were assigned to the craft table and we were both so grateful to be located in a well shaded area. The air was sticky and oppressive. Even the children were moving from activity to activity in a sluggish slow motion. As laughing groups of children meandered in and out of our station, we had a chance to get to know a little more about each other. We talked about our grandchildren, husbands and children. We laughed at some of the funny things we had in common. She shared about her faith and why she came to church alone. We both agreed that one day our greatest hope is to sit side by side with our entire families in worship. As we swept up glitter and google eyes off the floor of the concrete shelter, she told me a little known fact. The spelling of her last name had been changed in the generation just before hers. She was related to a very well-known criminal. Her family wasn’t necessarily ashamed but they were tired of their identifier being tied to the actions of one single person. It was a part of their story but it certainly wasn’t the whole story.

A last name is an identifier but it isn’t a person’s sole identity.

I thought about her words as I packed my kids in the backseat of my rusty Suburban. I rolled all the windows down and began the drive home. We were all too exhausted to talk and I think we were all wishing we had saved enough to fix the air-conditioner. I stopped at the drive through window of a fast food restaurant and ordered 7 ice-cream cones. It seemed like the entire city had the same idea so we sat in silence for a long time waiting to pull forward. My 8-year-old suggested we buy a cone for daddy and then remembered he was out of town. He burst out laughing at the thought of giving the gift of a melted ice-cream cone. His laugh is contagious and it took us a minute to catch our breath. I found myself asking, “What would you want people to know about you? What makes you, you?” Here are a few of the things my kids want you to know about who we really are…

“I am a good singer, my room is messy and I love to read. I am going to be a writer one day.”

“I am going to be a master Lego builder when I grow up. My kids will think it’s so cool that I work for Legos. I also like bats. I kind of wish I was still a baby but I’m glad I don’t poop my pants.”

“Ha Ha Ha, he said ‘poop!’ I have a friend named Miles, I don’t like sports and my dog is Mandela. I am enthusiastic. Oh and Jesus made me.”

“I love to dance. I like gymnastics and being outside. I like to help others and I like serving at church.”

“Jesus made me, that’s why I’m so handsome.”

“I’m good at football. School is hard. I wish you would let me get two ice-cream cones.”

“I have two moms, two dads, a chicken, 7 siblings plus 5 more bio-siblings.”

The conversation contained a few more references to buggers and farts before I threatened to pull out of line and forego the treat we had all been waiting for. They stifled their giggles and I smiled. We are an adoptive family, that will always be one of our identifiers. It isn’t all that we are. We are a family of faith. We are a large family. We are silly. We are a preacher’s family. We are a loud family. We are a theater family, football family, church family, Indiana family. We are dog people. We more recently have become cat people too. We are an adoptive family. We are more than our adoption. We are a family.

What is your identifier? Who is your family? Share your story with us in the comment section below this post…

Already listed as a #1 New Release in Adoption & Special Needs Parenting on Amazon, Mike Berry’s brand new book, Confessions Of An Adoptive Parent, is now available for pre-order! When you order your copy by February 6th, you get access to over $400 in free bonus content, including 2 video series, downloadable PDF guides, a ton of colorful images to share, and much more! Visit confessionsofanadoptiveparent.com/book to order your copy today!

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Mike and Kristin Berry are the Co-Founders of The Honestly Adoption Company and have been parents for nearly two decades. They are the authors of six books, and the host of The Honestly Adoption Podcast.

Sarah Gray

Sarah Gray is the executive assistant to Mike and Kristin Berry. And she is the best in the land. In addition to providing a warm and friendly response to the many emails our company receives on a weekly basis, she also manages Mike and Kristin’s speaking and meeting schedules, and makes sure that team events go off without a hitch.

Nicole Goerges

Nicole Goerges is a Content Contributor & Special Consultant for The Honestly Adoption Company. She works with Mike and Kristin as a recurring co-host for the Honestly Adoption Podcast, and co-host of Kitchen Table Talks, exclusive video content for Oasis Community, along with Kristin. She is a fellow adoptive mom, and former foster parent.

Matt McCarrick

Matt McCarrick is the Content Production Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. If you’ve loved listening to our podcast, or enjoyed any of the videos trainings we’ve published, you have Matt to thank. He oversees all of our content production, from video edits, to making sure the tags are correct on YouTube, to uploading new videos to Oasis, to hitting publish on a podcast episode, he’s a content wonder!

Karen Anderson

Karen Anderson is the Community Engagement Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. She spends the bulk of her time interacting with, and helping, people through our various social media channels, as well as providing support for Oasis Community members through chat support or Zoom calls. In the same spirit as Beaver, Karen is also passionate about connecting with parents and making them feel loved and supported. Karen is also an FASD trainer and travels often, equipping and encouraging parents.

Beaver Trumble

Beaver Trumble is the Customer Care Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. Chances are, if you have been in need of technical support, or forgotten your password to one of our courses, you have interacted with Beaver. He is an absolute pro at customer care. In fact, he single-handedly revolutionized our customer care department last year. Beaver is passionate about connecting with parents and making them feel loved and encouraged.

Kristin Berry

Kristin Berry is the co-founder of, and Chief Content Specialist for, The Honestly Adoption Company. She spends most of her time researching and connecting with guests for our podcast, as well as direction, designing and publishing a lot of the content for our social media channels, blog and podcast. She loves to connect with fellow parents around the world, and share the message of hope with them.

Mike Berry

Mike Berry is the co-founder of, and Chief Marketing Specialist for, The Honestly Adoption Company. He spends the bulk of his time and energy designing and building many of the resources you see within our company, as well as social media and email campaigns. His goal is to use media as a means to encourage and equip parents around the world. He is also the co-host of The Honestly Adoption Podcast.