If you’ve spent more than a couple of days on this journey, you know rejection is par for the course. Regardless of how hard you try to connect, build trust, reach out, or meet needs, your child rejects you. It can be soul crushing, and just plain exhausting. You’re left feeling like a failure.
But you aren’t. In fact, there’s way more going on with your child than meets the eye. We know that behavior is a window into past trauma. Rejection is a by-product of this.
In this episode we break down these truths….
- It’s NOT about you! Hard pill to swallow (we know!). But the fact is, your child’s rejection is not about you. It’s about them. More than that, it’s about everything they went through before coming into your care. Their rejection is the voice of their past trauma. It’s not about you.
- Knowing that it’s not about you, you must begin moving from victim to confident caregiver. When you are equipped with the reality of your child’s trauma history, you can stand up, love, and lead your child with confidence and peace of mind.
- Their wall is protection. Fact is, they don’t push you away to push YOU away. Rejection is the way your child has learned to survive. It’s their weapon of defense against being rejected first (which many of our kids have gone through)
- When we feel rejected, we often resort to rejecting others. Keep this in mind. The old saying goes, “Hurt people, hurt people.” This applies here. If your child has faced his or her fair share of rejection, chances are, they are using rejection as their weapon of defense.
- Vulnerability is dangerous. It’s dangerous for ANY human being, but especially a human being who has been deeply wounded by past trauma.
Knowing all of this helps you to become the best parent possible because you now know how to respond to your child’s rejection with grace and compassion.
Also on the show….
- Insight VIRTUAL Conference 2021 is coming April 29th and 30th and WE CAN’T WAIT. We will be joined by world-class pros like Deborah Gray, Dr. Ira Chasnoff, Jamie Finn, Ligia Cushman, Brooke Randolph, Lisa Qualls, Melissa Corkum and more! We haven’t opened up registration yet but you will want to be on the update list for 2 reasons: 1) you will automatically be entered to win some of our amazing giveaways and bonus content when you register early. Click Here to get on the list!
- Get our BRAND NEW practical guide on understanding trauma today! We just released a video guide and worksheet entitled Trauma Knowledge 101 and it helps parents gain a simple understanding of how trauma has changed the brain and how they can learn to respond to their children in a way that builds trust and connection. It’s 100% FREE. Click Here to get access!
Thanks for stopping by this week!